Mum, Dad, or the amazing adult who looks after me... can I ask you a question?
If someone put a strange food in front of you that you'd never seen before, what would you do?
Would you put the whole thing straight into your mouth?
Probably not.
You'd look at it first. You might pick it up, turn it over, give it a sniff, and maybe even watch someone else eat it before deciding whether you wanted to try it.
Well... I do exactly the same thing.
The only difference is that almost every food is new to me.
Before I can even think about taking a bite, my brain is already gathering information through my senses. I don't have the words to explain it yet, but my body is asking lots of important questions.
Is this safe?
Is it hot or cold?
Will it be crunchy, slimy or soft?
Can my mouth handle it?
Do the people I love look calm while they're eating it too?
All of that happens before I even think about chewing.
The Natural Sensory Ladder
That's why you might see me "playing" with my dinner. It probably looks like I'm mucking around, but my brain is actually doing some very important learning.
Many children move through what feeding therapists often call a sensory ladder. Before we're ready to chew and swallow a new food, our brain often needs time to get used to it.
I might begin by simply looking at the food from across the table. Once that feels okay, I might smell it, poke it with my finger or fork, squash it between my fingers, or listen to the sound it makes when someone else bites into it. Eventually, I might feel brave enough to give it a tiny lick. One day I might chew it, and later still, swallow it.
Not every child climbs this ladder in exactly the same way. I might skip a step, move backwards, or spend a long time on one step before I'm ready for the next. That's completely normal.
Long before I understand words like protein, vitamins or fibre, I'm learning through my senses. Every one of those experiences helps my brain decide whether a food feels familiar and safe.
So if I don't eat a new food straight away, it doesn't mean I've learnt nothing. Looking is learning. Smelling is learning. Touching is learning. Watching you enjoy it is learning. Even taking one tiny lick is learning.
Every positive experience helps my brain build familiarity and confidence.
How Long Does it take to climb the ladder?
You might be wondering, "Okay Kai... so how long does this take?"
The honest answer is... it depends.
Some foods only need a few relaxed, positive experiences before I feel ready to taste them. Other foods might take weeks or months. Some foods might not feel okay until I'm older, when my mouth, my taste buds and my confidence have all grown.
Every food and child has its own timeline.
If my brain is neurodivergent, like if I have Autism or ADHD, certain textures, smells or tastes can feel much more intense. My nervous system may need many more positive experiences before a food feels safe enough to explore. That doesn't mean I'm being stubborn or naughty. It means my brain is working extra hard.
The important thing to remember is that this isn't a race.
If it takes me six months just to let a piece of broccoli sit on my plate without becoming upset, that's still progress. Every calm, pressure-free experience is helping my brain learn.
We're playing the long game together:)
Starting Early Is My Superpower (But It's Never Too Late)
This is why introducing lots of different tastes, smells and textures while I'm little can be so helpful. During the first year or so of eating, many babies are naturally curious about new foods. As toddlers grow, it's very common for them to become more cautious around unfamiliar foods. This is called food neophobia, and it's a normal part of development.
The more positive food experiences I have while I'm young, the more familiar my world becomes.
But if I'm already older, please don't worry.
My brain can still learn.
Children of all ages can build confidence around food. We simply start where I am today and take one small, pressure-free step at a time.
Why Pressure Doesn't Help
When people beg, bargain, bribe, or keep saying, "Just one bite," my brain goes into overdrive trying to stay safe. Instead of learning that the food is okay, I start connecting that food with worry, stress, and arguments.
That's why pressure actually makes trying new foods harder, not easier.
What helps me most is feeling calm, safe, and in control. The goal isn't to force me to eat. The goal is just to help me feel safe enough to explore.
Every single look, sniff, touch, and tiny lick is a massive step forward!
Can I ask you a queston?
Grab a pen with your wrong hand and try writing a whole paragraph neatly, while everyone watches and tells you to hurry up.
Feels hard, eh? Your muscles in your hand won't work, it takes massive brainpower, and it looks a total mess. You know what the letters are, but your body just hasn't built the muscle memory yet.
That’s exactly what learning to chew and handle new foods is like for me. My mouth and brain are literally building a brand-new physical skill from scratch. It takes heaps of practice, ages of time, and a load of patience.
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PS...Feeding is a team effort.Speech-language therapists (SLTs) help children with feeding, chewing, swallowing, oral motor skills and eating safely.Occupational therapists (OTs) help with posture, body positioning, sensory processing, motor skills and making me feel comfortable while eating.Dietitians help make sure I'm getting the nutrition I need while building a positive relationship with food.Together, we help children feel safe, confident and curious around food.